I'm quite worried, let me add that on a very heavy note to this entry. For once, heaven forbid as you all are probably thinking in your minds, its not about Ian. Its about my friends. Now considering that Savannah and Josh have left my side due to military inflictions and I never had a big group of friends to begin with...Fighting or fighting without annoucing it is the worst feeling one could put themselves through. Erika and Jennifer? I dont know what to tell you. I can say that I am not naive. I notice what Erika's problem with me is. Its because of what Ian did last saturday. I wont say my opinions on what he did, but I will state that you cannot hold me accountable for my boyfriends actions. Granted, yes, he is my boyfriend, that does not mean that I control every movement and word. Every action and phrase that he says or does is purely out of HIS OWN judgement. If you hold me accountable and guilty for that, then I can only begin to wonder what I did wrong. Jennifer? Ahh :sighes: I think I've got the just of whats happening here. I've started talking and conversating to Heather alittle more often. I dont if perhaps that bothers you, or maybe you agree with Erika that I should be held responsible for my boyfriends actions. What ever the case may be, let me consider this. We've been through alot. Just think and remember. And I close this on that note. I am unsure where my friends loyalties lay with me. Perhaps its because I have been taken with Ian that they resent me. I wont deny it, I am falling deeply into him. Perhaps I have been ignoring you, but let me inform you now it was never intentional. That feeling when your so wrapped up into someone else? This is it. Know that when this happens to you, I will stick by your side. Jennifer, remember Micheal? I went loverly along with that. Erika, remember Brandon, even now? I agreed that it wasn't wrong to be in love with the bad people. I was there even when I didn't particularly want to be. That is friendship. Doing something for someone just because you know it makes them happy. Who knows, perhaps Im making this all up in my head. I have those tendencies sometimes.
Courtney