Wow. I have to say that today hasn't been bad at all. I got to drive for my very first time and considering I am well underaged I was freaking out. But somehow Monsiuer Brant calmed me down and I drove. I thought that I did pretty well. I got to drive in circles in the parking lot and then up a road. ^.^ I was excited...well...over joyed. It brightened my day in many ways. A. Someone cared enough to show me how. B. Someone trusted me enough to let me use there car. C. I'm not really all that chicken now, am I?
:laugh: Although it sounds insane at first but really its not all that bad. Erika, its a piece of cake as long as you relax. ^-^ Rightio. I have the sudden urge to just lock myself up in my room tonight and play my violin. A lovely candle flickering for light against my red walls. Everything in its place and the faint aroma of peace can find its way into my hands. Its like when I hold my violin or any instrument for that matter the whole world just stops. Every problem that I have had at that moment dissapears. Note names and fingerings file into my head and leave the moment they enter. I'm enthralled. I'm taken away by such things. But lately my playing skills have been discouraging. No peace would come from this, only frustration out of not playing aloud to anyone. I'm afraid of showing someone how I sound. I haven't played for another in a long while and I'm just afraid I suppose. Who knows. But what ever, I guess I'll have to just yearn for being able to play and dreaming of that peace. There are only four times in my life that I am at peace truly. One. Playing Music aloud. Either with Instruments, Singing, or playing a CD. Two. Helping someone out when they think there world is falling down. Three. Having someone hold me and tell me that eventually everything will be okay. Four. When I am writing.
Four main times in my life that I can stop thinking about my problems, everyone elses, and god what ever else goes on up there and PAUSE! RELAX! STOP AND JUST TAKE IT ONE SECOND AT A TIME!...Yeah. This is a content entry. I'm not sad but I'm not extremely hyper. Happy but mellow. Yeah. ^.^
Courtney