We Broke up.
That simple. I feel so low, lower than ive ever been before. And Its okay to feel that way. My faith in changing him hasnt been broken, Ill keep on believing that I can change him, until he becomes immune to my kind smile.
But inside im dying, dying because ive been trying so hard. And its failed. Its like working on a painting for years, and then all of a sudden it catches fire, and your stranded, angry at the person who lit the fire, and yet again, angry at yourself for your persistance of keeping up the painting. And you start all over again, still wounded like before, as the canvas has burnt marks on it, like the scars of life. But you paint over that, starting over, and realizing that you can do this again, as long as your more cautious, and self away. And even though your doing the same thing you worked so hard to do last time, and your energy isnt as strong as before.Your wounded, hurt. but its okay, and you try again...praying that the fire isnt as close as before.
Courtney