I think that sometimes, I just want to shoot my emotions. >.< :crosses arms: You know those times in life, when you think something is going to be over before it has even begun, so you tell the person in that situation, exactly how you feel about it....even if it is a bit.. "off the wall" and crazy. All that bullshit. Well, me, under the assumption that I was about lose something really new and important to me, went ahead and said everything. Stupid fucking move. I feel stupid, but hey, I suppose thats the advantages of being YOUNG. Fuck. SPEAKING of young. Lets take a poll here, shall we? A relationship between a 14 year old and a 16 ( whos soon turning 17 ) year old is wrong. You tell me. Leave a note. Email. Im seriously disturbed my this topic. This was one of the main reasons I ended up telling that person ( Ian. For all those of you who are clueless. ) exactly how I felt. Sorta like that cartoon episode when Helga thinks shes dying so she tells Arnold that she loves him...but then doesn't die? Sorta the same, only different reasons. :Laughs and dies: And he was right. The definition of what I told him was scary, and is powerful. Overcoming, fear, the passion. All of it so big. But...:sighes: Thats how I felt. Something so deep, so... :sighes: There is nothing really to describe it. I knew it was too early to even be sure about this, and I should have just bit my tongue. Because the moment I told him in a letter, he gave me a letter. Saying that the situation wasn't over. Say it with me now. I-D-I-O-T! I am an Idiot. A few days ago it was dork now its Idiot. I'm rising up here in the ranks aren't I? But it feels great. :leans back: He's at work. Argh. I was sorta wishing that he had today off, but, :shrug: Guess not. Oh well. :whistles: ALTER BOY! >D Lmfao. God.. I wont even get into that one. I wonder how this is going to work between his parentals. ( okay, so you've gone the whole entry without knowing the whole situation, let me spell it out in full detailed sentences. ) Ian's parentals think that I am too young to be dating him. ( Im 14 for those of you who are not paying attention! *ruler slap* ) And I think it went on the lines of this. If I had JUST turned 14, ( In which we all know I have, if you paid attention to JULY'S Entries. *double ruler slap* ) then it was completely and absolutely too young. Now I don't know if they were going to force him to break up with me? Or...:shrug: Who knows. But thats not the point. Above was what I was left to go about my day with. And it was depressing. So I wrote him the letter...telling EXACTLY how I thought about him, even though Its a major mistake to make in a start of a new relationship. I was on the impression that I would have to deal with the loss of Ian. *Urrrr!* Wrong. Ian handed me a note saying that he doesn't normally keep things from his parentals. ( Neither do I really, I value trust, but there a few things that they *dont* know about.. :thinks: The Firm ring any bells? ) But in this case he would make a exception. So...I just made a big big big mistake. ><;; Fuuuuuuck. :sigh: Oh well, I suppose Ill move onward. I felt like an idiot though. I swear on it. I let my emotions run free without logical reasoning yet, only assumption. Sorta like how in Biology. ( :Laughs and dies for remembering this: ) You should trust only Theories and not hypothesis's. HAH! Take that Ian! and I hate Bio. :laugh: Anyway. I wrote Erika and said that I was sorry for all the shit that was said this summer, it was really unecessary, so now we're cool. ^-^ She said she was sorry as well. I cant stand having enemies. I swear by it. :Crosses arms: Well, here goes to more time wasted with Courtney.
Courtney