Got to go pee...brb. 7:26. p.m.
-7:27 p.m. back...
Not like you needed that information or anything. Wow, I'm going to try and explain this whole weekend. Friday Night- DYED MY HAIR BLACK!! I went the Homecoming football game with Erika. An awful sort of thing happened. I almost fell back into Ian because I wanted somewhere there to hold me, to love me, to kiss my forehead gently, to just understand all the shit that was going on. I didn't have to like them and fuck they could have been the stupidest person in the world. As long as they were willing to hold me I was open. But of course the first person I happen to spot is Ian and everything comes rushing back to me. The way I wanted things, the way that things turned out to be. I was so unhappy and it hurt so badly. But of course I ended up telling him that I was just wanting to be with him out of habit and that broke and severed all future ties. Its what I wanted and needed more so then anything at the moment.
Saturday, Morning/Night- The day seemed to pass with much ease up until the mid point of the day. It was spent with getting everything and everyone ready for Homecoming. I didnt really talk or was concentrated with too many things at one large amount. 5ish to 6:30ish was spent getting ready for Homecoming.
Homecoming : The whole event in it self had miniture conflicts which were offshoots and after results of another. I wasn't really to concerned on problems just focused on what was infront of me. The whole thing in general didn't start to really pick up until the latter part. ^^;; Then it was really moving. About 11:00ish we went back to Toby's house for the 'after par-tay.' sleepover thing. Let me thank people individually.
Erika - YEAH BUDDY! It seems like we both had a great night. I enjoyed it alot. Alot of just laying under the covers and asking what the hell was wrong with movies and that stuff. I love just lounging around. Having you there made it great.
Toby - :smiles: Without you man, all of this wouldnt have been made possible. You seemed to brighten moods alot... but I also have to thank you for the 'big brother' intervention that you did between me and Ian. I felt safe and that you would actually protect me from anything that could have happened. I think that our friendship is growing better as the days continue on. Looking forward to more good times and co ed sleepovers. ^^;;
Brant - You just made me happy my letting me see the you and Stacy sleeping scene. It was so cute and it felt like something that I tried to put together for once, acutually worked. It made me want to just jump up and down screaming. 'YES FINALLY!' Thanks a million for letting me see it, even though you were in Brantland.
Stacy - Ditto for the things Ive said to Brant above. Letting me see that scene made me so happy. Dont apologize for being in Stacyland all night because you deserved in a million times plus. ^^;;
Moyers - God man, besides being scarred for life because of your little trick, you made me laugh so hard. Again a brightener of moods and the wonderful pretender. Thanks.
Ian - Eh.. I dont want to say too many things here and just fuck everything we've been trying to work for. Lets just say that you didnt make things easier but you did contribute into the night. Thanks. If anything you helped the thinking process and the confirmation on the decisions I needed to make.
In general I had a great time and enjoyed every second of it. Go me Go me go me
Sunday - Just layed around Toby's house until 5:00ish and then stayed home. About 6-7 Brant came over and we drove around for awhile. Moyers called him and said that he needed a place to stay. So Moyers stayed the night with Brant and all was saved. I had a nice talk with Brant in the car and was happy with things in general. Let me start a new section about thise night.
Sunday night: After I got home I got online and awhile ago a guy had left a note in my diary commenting my diary. ^^;; I was really happy and left to put one in his. He mentioned in his diary that he was going to be starting Fort Campbell High soon. ^.^ I was like "yay!!! Oppertunity to make a friend." Although I believe that him being gay and funny had defiante extra brownie points. I started to talk with him on Yahoo messenger and we made plans to meet Monday morning. I talked to him on the phone from 11ish-1:00. It was great and I really enjoyed it. I hadn't laughed so much in a long time. It was a wonderful oppertunity to make things happier then they were.
Monday - 10:37 I woke up and the first thing that I did was call Brant. Got the info on what had happened with Moyers and had told him about Mister Mark. ( Guy from the night before. ^.^ ) He was cool with it. About 12:00 I started walking to meet Mark. Instantly ( literatly ) We clicked and just started talking like we had known each other forever. We went to Brants and all just laughed up a storm. I swear to god, I just... yeah. Its the friend that you can just laugh with when shit isn't even funny. Brant and Toby being there made me a million times happier. We went on a little endeavor towards the PX....Picked up Vannah and Erika...waited for Shawn... Vannah and Erika left....Came back to apologize to Mark's mom for being late. ( It really annoys me that the woman gives off the ultimate untrust and hate vibe towards me. I want to make a good first impression and I am going to try and give an effort for that to happen. ) Went to the little picnic shed and just hung out. Brant had gone home at that time and it was just me, Toby, and Mark ( homo boy. ^.^ lol ) We played around for awhile before Toby went to Brants house. Mark and I went to ask his Mom if he could meet my mom. He kept calling me Britney for the whole walk up there... but that was ontop of goofing off and laughing. I enjoyed his company completely and Couldnt stop laughing myself. We got to my house and Mark being intiated as a new friend met my mom and all that good stuff. Brant picked Mark up and brought him home. I just stayed on the computer and chilled out for awhile. Brant and Toby came back later to just drive around. I went along and slept most of the time. Brant noticed that something wasn't right bought me Twizzlers, that wonderful fellow, him. Thanks a million Brant, thanks thanks thanks. "Tomorrow's another day of school, but look on the bright side, I get to see a homosexual tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow, and the day after that. " - Courtney Smith
Courtney