Things seem to be fitting more and more into my own little nutshell that I've horrendously started coining the term, "Life." But all's well that ends well. This afternoon was all about *Studying!* Exams start tomorrow and I'm trying my best not to freak out completely. A good thing is that Mom says, even if I do, do terrible on the exams.. I'm NOT grounded.. Therefore. COURTNEY IS TECHNICALLY UNGROUNDED RIGHT NOW! Thats it ladies and gents, Courtney is ungrounded if you see it that way. In all actuallity I have three more days... but since no more grades are being added into my current grade status.. IM GOOD! Courtney has made it off with all A's and B's fellow readers and friends of the colored and non colored denomination. : laughs : Yeah.. oh yeah. I got a $50 check in the mail today from DD ( my biological fathers mother.. I visited her once.. but now we're sorta not talking.. but she thinks about me enough to send me money for Christmas.. satisfactory. ) So Christmas shopping worries are out the window. Mom okayed the mall on friday, LOTR ( Lord of the rings, Stacy. ^_^ Lol. ) on friday, my piercing on saturday, and the sleepover on satruday night at Toby's. Speaking of that.. TOBY WHERE WERE YOU TODAY? Curious.. curious. But yeah.. in a way I'm starting to feel like a *poser* for getting my nose pierced.. it's really weird.. I meannnnn.. arrr. Being an Erika poser is great, but I think she's starting to get annoyed with that.. So.. I'm debating on whether to actually get my nose pierced or not.. hrm. We shall see. I went to my Therapy appointment at 3:00 with Ms. Nementhy. It was a great session. She made me dig up old memories.. the worst ones I've ever held onto.. made me look and see more then what was there when I looked at them alone. She pin pointed why I believe anger is such a bad thing. Its a childs thinking. You see you parents fighting.. ( Thats the memory she made me dig into.. ) and as a child you go.. " okay, this will never happen to me.. so I wont get angry.. " and for a 5 year old.. it works. But for a young adult? Child's thinking can no longer be valid. Therfore.. my thinking currently of.. " I wont get mad.. " Is actually Courtney's 5 year old child self going.. " Alright.. DO NOT GET ANGRY! You're not allowed to, you don't want to act like Mommy and Daddie did, do you?" ... Pretty cool, isn't it? It made me stop and think.. -Wow, this woman is really good at her work.- Now I understand why I can never get angry at someone fully.. why I turn inwardly ( cutting ) to avoid spreading what my childlike thinking believes is a 'cootie'... so yeah.. we'll stick with.. ' anger cooties.. ' : shakes head.. : Man.. sometimes.. I swear.. : laugh : but yeah.. I'm out.
Courtney